Statistikken taler efterhånden sit tydelige sprog. Flere og flere ægteskaber ender med forlis, og for mange bliver den eventyrlige drøm aldrig realiseret. Det kan godt være denne artikel ikke er berettiget på denne side, men det er umuligt at se bort fra, at et livslangt bryllup mere er en sjældenhed end en vane i vore dage.
Der er mange forklaringer
Der er mange forklaringer på, hvorfor det går, som det går i dag. Nogen siger den hurtige omskiftelige verden har skylden. Nogle mener, at de gamle generationer kæmpede mere, og ikke gav så let op, og nogen stiller spørgsmål ved ægteskabets fundament, om det virkelig er mennesket forundt og muligt, at kunne leve med kun en partner gennem et helt liv. Og selv om mange af ovenstående problemstilling bestemt spiller ind, er det ofte de helt små ting, der afgør om et ægteskab består tidens test.
Alle forhold har det med at starte med at slå gnister
Alle forhold har det med at starte med at slå gnister, ikke af problemer men af ren kærlighed. Forelskelsen er jo en vidunderlig tid, og vi nyder det alle sammen. Onde tunger siger ofte, at det blot er en sygdom, men der findes mange, der forbliver i en form af forelskelse gennem hele deres forhold. Der er også en anden side, og det er mere dyster, og handler om, at mange forhold bare ikke holder i længden. En af de helt store årsager er, at man vokser fra hinanden, og det kan ske på mange måder.
En helt unik begivenhed
En helt unik begivenhed i ethvert menneskes liv er at blive gift, og med ægteskabet følger der ofte børn, og de kan vende op og ned på både mandens og kvindens liv og opfattelse af sig selv og omverden. For mænd sker der et helt specielt skift i rollefordelingen ved en fødsel. Fra at have været i centrum for kvindens opmærksomhed i forholdet, rykker manden et skridt ned på kvindens par-heraki. Det betyder ikke noget i starten, da overvældelsen over barnet i sig selv er nok, men på længere sigt kan manden komme til at mangle den opmærksomhed, han var vant til, og kvinden kan let komme til at overse ham. Ikke at det altid er sådan, men det kan ske.
Det samme gælder for kvinden. Hun kan let blive overset, og de behov manden førhen var mere opmærksom på bliver ikke tilfredsstillet på samme måde som før. Manden mister måske langsomt interessen for at gøre kvinden glad, og de små overraskelse i hverdagen bliver glemt i den stressede hverdag, der følger med. Og det er her det begynder at gå ned ad bakke, og glidebanen er lagt. Derfor er det vigtig ikke at glemme at forkæle hinanden, og husk at forholdet ikke kun drejer sig om jeres børn, men i lige så høj grad om jer.
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